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Basically, just because someone is wearing a spiky collar and skintight PVC to a Goth club does not mean she's into S&M.

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This is a bit like suggesting that everyone who owns a pair of Ugg boots prefers the same sexual position.

Belonging to the subculture does not mean favouring the same sexual preferences - everyone is different.

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This post covers some of the ins-and-outs (oo-er, Matron) of Gothy relationships; mostly useful, perhaps, from a non-Goth's perspective.

Showing that you respect them as they are is likely to earn you many, many brownie points.) So whilst you don't need to impress your loved one by reciting poetry by candlelight, taking her to the funeral home or sending her bunches of dead roses, and you definitely should not change yourself (put down that black hair dye, right now...), some of your gifts or dates could be a little more spooky. A concert - make sure it is a band that you BOTH enjoy. If your town has a small, little-known, out-of-the-way coffee shop (every town seems to have one of these, I think it's a rule), go there.

Spooky gifts: A gothic necklace (NOT Halloween jewellery, it can be tacky and is likely to fall apart) A heart-shaped box filled with Halloween sweets A bunch of deep red roses A book of dark poetry A mix CD of dark/Goth music A handmade bracelet ..your imagination. Double points if it doubles as an art gallery or bookstore.Goths just seem to drink more cider and thereby suffer worse hangovers (my tip - toffee apple cider, the ultimate perkygoth drink).Because of the links between Goth and the 'vampyre' subculture/lifestyle (more coming soon on this), it is often assumed that Goths indulge in blood play (cutting each other or drinking each other's blood during sex). Blood-drinking = not your best idea.) Because of Goth's open-mindedness (yes, that again), there is a general consensus that 'what takes place between consenting adults stays between said adults', but since most Goths (and most vampyres, come to that...) a) do not believe they are vampires, b) do not have any particular affinity for blood (I have a tendency to faint if someone gets a nosebleed in my general vicinity), and c) do not like the idea of or take part in cutting themselves or other people, I would draw the conclusion that this is very unlikely in 99% of cases. Lately, I have also seen many articles on Wiki How with titles such as "How to get a Goth guy to like you (even if you're not Gothic)" and "How to win the heart of a Goth girl". ) that many of these are written tongue-in-cheek or from personal experience, making them about an even mix of amusing and sweet.Or my parents (hi Mum, Dad *waves*). Fair enough, there are some Goths who don't choose to date outside the scene.This can be for myriad reasons - they may not feel 'understood' by non-subcultural types; they may feel they have little in common with non-Goths; they may enjoy dressing up in dashing black attire and hitting the spooky clubs with their significant other.Alternative Dating UK is a the original and best dating site for those of us looking for a dating alternative - someone a bit different to date, the original alternative dating website.

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