Hilarious dating profile dating myanmar lady

Over time you will blame me and grow hostile when I don't fulfill every need you've ever had.

Bonus points if you just finished dating every guy in town but now want to take your time with me.

In my free time I have written a thesaurus that included an emphasis on the most useful curses. I have middling intelligence but try to appear smarter by affecting a world-weary air, memorizing useless statistics, and chuckling at my own mean-spirited, agenda-driven jokes.

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I enjoy drinking, petty theft, pornography, and self-righteous indignation. I love to give compliments that prominently display my gender stereo-types.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.

By Anthea Paul Allen & Unwin Your Personal Profile – The facts about me My full name is _____I was born on _____(day/month/date)I am a _____ citizen and this makes me feel _____ My star sign is _____ My parents are _____ I have _____ siblings (if you have them!

)I am currently at _____ school / university / college or I currently work at _____What I like about my school studies / job is _____What I dislike about my school studies / job is _____I am saving up for _____ because _____My home is in _____(place) and I have lived here for _____(years)My friends are _____ (names and descriptions)I love people who _____ (take risks / tell funny stories, etc.)My favorite activity/activities include _____ and I love to do this because _____My favorite color is _____ because it reminds me of _____I love to say _____ and my most over-used saying is probably _____My favorite meal involves _____ and my favorite snack food is _____I consider myself to be _____ (healthy/unhealthy) and fitness _____ is/is not important to me.

If you're not having any luck with finding love using dating apps and sites Britain, you might idly wonder about casting your net further afield.

But unless you're looking for a very quirky sort of date, Russia might be the very place to look.

Age unimportant, but I often condescend to women under 22 and rehash mother issues with women over 43. I am king of my castle and I want a woman to git me a beer after she mows the yard. Everything should be done for me, draw me a bath, cook,clean, wash .

My woman will also have to have a job to support me.

Creating an attention-grabbing entry on a matchmaking site requires the same tools as any successful advertising campaign: You want to draw attention and curiosity so a could-be match will want to read more.

SWM in boring job seeks whiny shrew for co-dependency, tepid sex, and shouting matches.

Welcome to my spoofy bachelor blog of hilarious real dating profiles gone awry.

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