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They awake to find that the semen has dried, adhering the sheets to their back like a cape that Superman would wear.11. When a womanuses a strap-on dildo to engage in anal sex with a man.12.

If you’ve seen porn, then you know there’s a wide world of sexual positions out there.

For some reason, it’s talked about like a sensual, naughty task that should be on everyone’s sexual bucket list. You know what’s hard to do while you’re writhing around and moaning? I’ll go down on you until you come, and then you can go down on me until I come. The risks of falling off or kneeing someone in their delicates is high.

But everyone knows that in reality, it’s a load of sh*t. You try it once, push through and pretend you’re having a great time (because it feels a bit rude to say ‘this is crap, shall we just stop), and silently vow never to do it again. Skillfully licking someone else’s genitals Are we supposed to be side by side? Much like shower sex, everyone talks about 69ing as if it’s this hot, naughty thing.

Historians aren't positive why it invokes the capital of Japan specifically, other than it's distant and would likely require a lot of effort to successfully reach Tokyo.8. This is a diplomatic way of saying ass-eating that's not "anilingus." That's it.9. The act of placing one's testicles gingerly into their partner's mouth, similarly to how you would dip a tea bag in hot water.10. You may remember this from Soulja Boy's "Crank That" (also, you may remember Soulja Boy from the year 2007). A threesome position wherein one person is bent over at the waist giving one guy oral sex, while the second guy has sex with the blow job giver from behind. The resultant mess then, uh, coming back out is said to resemble a dripping cream pie. Shaking your head from side to side between a woman's breasts, creating a noise like the engine of a boat.20. Also commonly called "two in the pink, one in the stink," the shocker is a modified fingerbanging technique where the pointer and middle finger are inserted into the vagina while the pinky is slipped into the anus.

Although Soulja Boy directs the act at "that hoe" this can be done to anyone. When a man ejaculates on a woman's chest and neck in a way that recalls an elegant pearl necklace. The whole thing resembles a pig roasting on a spit.16. A modified spit roast wherein the two bros are really amped and high five a bunch, creating a triangular shape that calls to mind the unique shape of the .17. Typically used to reference porn that doesn't end in a facial (because it's important to differentiate).18. A group activity in which at least three guys masturbate to completion over a woman's body. The pinky is usually used without warning, "shocking" the recipient.

Maybe you’ve even tried a few of them in your time. Just because you’ve seen it on TV does not mean you should try it at home, kids.

I mean, if Joanna Angel is enjoying getting twisted around like a Kama Sutra-inspired pretzel, chances are your lady will too, right? Sexual positions are not all created equal, especially for women.

Two partners perform oral sex on one another simultaneously, with one lying on their back while the other lies on top; each of them facing the others genitals, forming a shape not dissimilar to a 69. It is also known as "water sports," which is why when you Google image search that, you get pictures of people smiling on jet skis mixed in with middle aged dudes peeing on teens. I'm not a doctor but this is probably not advisable, health-wise.7. The act of twisting and fiddling with your partner's nipples as if they were radio knobs.

This is sometimes purposeful, and sometimes used to describe someone who is inexperienced and terrible at nipple play.

So to help you out, here’s a list of 20 of the most popular sexual positions, ranked by how they feel for a woman. What’s true for one is not necessarily true for all. It would behoove you to have a conversation with your partner to find out how this list ranks for her.

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